On Saturday, September 24, the Shack Tabloid crew took a weekend vacation to Chile, for some relaxation and fun in the sun.  Unfortunately, moments after exiting the plane, Erick was seen walking hand-in-hand with Hattie, otherwise known as TheMadHatter.  Needless to say, the vacation was cut short, and the Shack Tabloid went into action, and we followed the two for three whole days! On the first day, Erick and Hattie merely roamed up and down the beaches.  Erick was constant giggling and talking about Moochi and their plans for global domination, while Kate randomly chased squirrels up trees.  After ten straight hours of this, the tabloid crew gave up and went home for the night.  Luckily, the next few days proved to be much more interesting. On day two, Erick and Hattie split up.  Tabloid Crew One went with Hattie, and Two went with Erick.  Sadly, Hattie was lost within the hour.  As it turns out, her squirrel-chasing was a ploy to disguise her astoundingly effective training.  Erick, on theContinue reading »

The latest Random Party Thursday at the Shack Out Back has forced all future Thursday parties to be held underground.  After a fleet of cyborgs was taken down by FBI super-ninjas, Dom went back to the future and brought back a small army of transforming robots, which inevitably led to an uncontrollable cesspool of sexing robots. After the failure of our intended protectors, the Shack Out Back RVs were left behind and all party-goers were forced to seek refuge in the New Orleans sewer system.  Unfortunately, our blind travels soon led us to Mexico, in a small, unnamed town that we’ve decided to call Chicken Thursday. With the fuzz hot on our tail, we soon voted to hold our parties in deeper, darker, awesomer strongholds across the land.  Each Thursday Party’s location will be referred to by super-secret names and impossibly complicated code that could never be cracked by even the most knowledgeable of cryptographers. Also, if anyone sees UK Guy, please ask him for my Scooby Doos back. [email protected]

This Halloween, Comicality plans to release his Savage Moon series on Kindle.  Little did he know that this is exactly what Orvus was hoping he would do. News swept the Shack Out Back quite quickly when Comsie announced the arrival of his brand new Comsie-box for the TV.  However, there was one person who has been waiting all month for this opportunity to arise.  The Shack Tabloid’s latest sources reveal that Orvus-Undercover is planning a new mind-blowing scheme in his campaign to end Comsie TV. Although the entire Shack Out Back community is on high alert, there’s no telling when Orvus will strike next.  If you have any clues, tips, or information regarding Orvus’s plans, what he’s been doing all month, or what we can expect in the following month, you are encouraged to help prevent any wrong-doings and contact the Shack Tabloid at: [email protected] immediately.

In the late hours of Tuesday, September 27, Erick’s plain-as-day kitty was seen on the outskirts of L.A. sitting on top of a large, wooden box.  In what was originally thought to be a routine catch-and-grab, animal control employees discovered that Moochi had kidnapped two boys. Moments after opening the box, Bort Ick-Ality was found buried beneath several sheets of flattened bubble wrap, sleeping next to Dima Borodin.  How dear old Moochi managed to drag the box so far has left officials stumped.  There were no track marks, skid marks, burn marks, or even paw prints to indicate any obvious means of travel. Moochi is currently being detained at the L.A. City Pound until this case is solved.  Any information leading to the closing of this matter will be rewarded with bubble wrap and a wooden box, with quarter-inch slats.

It all started on Friday, August 19, 2011, when Orvus went clubbin’ with some friends.  The following Sunday, he reported his first alcohol-related blackout, but this is what really happened: Somewhere between club numbers two and three, Orvus was slipped The Blue Pill, which triggered a secretly implanted sleeper chip, embedded at the back of the neck against the brainstem.  This sleeper chip is designed to gain access to the hippocampus, where it then hijacks all function in order to access, what is referred to as, shadow memories.  In short, the Orvus we all know and love is blocked to give birth to a sleeper agent.   Immediately following, Orvus hacked into the Pentagon’s mainframe, connected with hundreds of different software companies, and then released thousands of Trojan packets that he disguised as updates. Consequently, anyone running WebTV was first to suffer the effects of this invasion.  On day one, our beloved Comicality was the only person in the entire world who unknowingly witnessed this event.  It started with mereContinue reading »

 With Erick living in California and Comicality living in Illinois, poor old Bort has become the victim of an unending custody battle. Despite all efforts to come to some kind of agreement, Bort Ick-Ality, son of Erick and Comicality, is still being tracked halfway across America twice per week or more.  What’s more is that, due to pricy travel expenses, Bort is now being shipped via courier in a medium-sized wooden crate, which Erick describes as “more economically sound.”  Comicality, however, refused to comment. In an attempt to speak to Bort alone, Imagine Magazine’s TurtleBoy had himself boxed and shipped from California to Illinois 16 times both ways, until finally being placed next to Bort’s box. “I dunno.  It’s all right, I guess.  I just wish they’d package me with more bubble wrap.  I always run out somewhere between Wyoming and Nebraska,” explains Bort, who was only given a ten foot by ten foot length to sit on.  In turn, I asked him how he felt about his two fathersContinue reading »

In an attempt to defend the honour of TurtleBoy’s Chase Ellison, who has recently been placed in the role of GFD’s Justin, TurtleBoy threw down the gauntlet and challenged Comicality to a duel.  In response to this, Comicality pushed TurtleBoy to the ground and ran off with the Shack Gauntlet. Although the investigation is still in its early stages, Shack officials have stated that “Comicality has become a menace to our community and must be brought to justice…  The gauntlet is a sacred tool, used to express honour and bravery.  Comicality has broken this tradition.”  Anyone who sees Comicality is warned to approach with extreme caution. A reward of $2.50 (U.S.) has been announced to any information leading to the capture of Comicality and the safe return of the Shack Gauntlet.  Any information on this matter can be reported [email protected] the word ‘Gauntlet’ in the subject header.

This past July, our very own Matt flew to Chicago to meet our bestest pal, Pete! However, unknowingly to Pete, Matt’s visit had been jam-packed with an ulterior motive: Matt planned to embark on a quest to unveil our beloved Comicality. He covered his tracks by posting a rouse of snapshots during his trip and shared images, like at a Cub’s game, a comedy club, the Willis Tower and the Navy Pier, in order to prevent the community from uncovering his true endeavour. Little did he know that Pete was on to him. Pete’s suspicion first began to grow after Matt’s insistency to ‘browse’ every last music store that they just happened to cross, but it wasn’t until Matt expressed interest in sitting outside a post office for hours on end that Pete was certain. That night, Pete sent a secret email to Comsie, informing him of Matt’s bogus vacation. The next morning, Pete lured Matt to an abandoned junkyard, where old, rusted cars were stacked even higher than theContinue reading »

Reports across the globe of a new, extremely contagious virus have hit cataclysmic proportion. One in every three people has already contracted the Erickoey Virus; the world fears that the remaining two are not far behind. It started in the United States. A train, on its way from Los Angeles to Chicago, was stopped just outside of Kansas City when it became apparent that travellers were becoming ill. Passengers were speaking in tongues, sometimes indecipherable, and would randomly bite the ankle of unsuspecting people. It didn’t take long before the crew realized they had to stop the train and declare a state of emergency. Government officials had quarantined the area, but the two mile radius quickly proved to be insufficient, as many guards soon began to behave sporadically. It was then that it was discovered that chocolate is an inducer. Anyone who partakes in the scrumptious treat will soon burst out in an uncontrollable rage and slap the nearest person. This is especially dangerous, as traces of chocolate, on theContinue reading »

The love affair between Bort and Orvus has crumbled, bringing unbalance to the community once again. While Bort prepares to attend at GreenHill Academy, Orvus’s soul is withering away. His hurt is now what fuels his rage, and his anger toward the vampire race grows stronger by the second. In a desperate attempt to reclaim his love, Orvus has sworn allegiance to the Dark Power of Sakdhshakajkallaka. As payment for his devotion, The Great Sakdhshakajkallaka awarded Orvus The Gift of Death and was reincarnated by The Blessing of Hatred and Vengeance. And although Orvus is now more powerful than ten elder vampires, his life force is now controlled by The Great Sakdhshakajkallaka. In exchange for his life, Orvus has been granted the will and means to destroy all those who came between him and Bort and will stop at nothing to fulfil this desire. Beware Shackonians of the First Order, for he will come for you first. Upon your demise The Great Sakdhshakajkallaka will rise again, bringing an evil toContinue reading »