Long, long ago, Wolfie was a corner-stone of the Shack Out Back. He held the community together with a little glue and a lot of love. But then, out of the blue, he disappeared; selected to lead a crew of five on an important mission to a far off galaxy, more than 36 light years away. I think.
He was sent to investigate a Goldilocks planet, roughly 36 light years away, called G i4591b.
“They were huge!” Wolfie explained with excitement. “The planet is about 4 times the size of Earth, and so are the people!”
According to Wolfie’s report, human-like giants, averaging at 23 feet, 5 inches in height, populate the planet with even bigger plant and animal life.
“We were worse than midgets. [We] could practically fit in the palm of their hands. And their wild life — simply amazing. Some were much like the dinosaurs that roamed our planet during the Jurassic period, others were just like our own; only much, much bigger.”
Wolfie is currently under quarantine to make sure that he hasn’t brought any super-sized viruses home with him. However, Shack scientists are reviewing samples and footage brought home by the team and will be released to the public in the coming months.
During this time, Shack Officials ask that we be patient and not to over-crowd our dear Wolfie, who is scheduled to be released from quarantine this coming Saturday, March 9, 2013.