Is it a smile? A wink? A certain way that someone looks or dresses? Maybe it’s something that they joke around about, or a list of interests that seem to be in line with a homosexual lifestyle. Have you ever just gotten the feeling that there was more than meets the eye when it came to someone close to you? Maybe even someone you’re interested in?

The topic is all about the concept of ‘gaydar’! Does it exist? Can you guys tell when another person of the same sex is gay/bi/lesbian just from your interactions with them? Is this a real thing? Sometimes people are rather open with their sexuality, but not always. Is there an instinct or a sixth sense that lets you know who might be a possibility when it comes to asking them out on a date? And if you can tell what OTHER people are looking for…do you think they can tell the same about you?

What are your thoughts on ‘gaydar’? And how well does it work for you? Or ‘against’ you, for that matter? Let us know your thoughts on this!


– “I have no gaydar. I’m quite desperately oblivious and clueless about that kinda thing.” – Akoplay

– “I believe in the existence of gaydar. Not scientifically backed but it hints more on the intuitive ability of people who are well-acquainted with the LGBT+ Lifestyle. Intuitive is part of our humanity and I think that the gaydar is something developed by those who have that tendency. Over time, it grows sharper but that doesn’t mean you would be correct all the time. Intuition is normally based on personal hunches and not on facts.

Yes, it works for me. Back then, I’m able to sniff out which guy would be willing to do it with me, and which guy wouldn’t budge no matter how hard I try. It would be easier to navigate towards them and sniff out those who are in-denial of their sexual tendencies. Having a sharper gaydar would help you press the right buttons. There was no way I would flirt with a guy who would have called me out, especially back in High School. I think you have an idea why it’s not always the best to out yourself when you’re still dealing things with yourself.

But it also works against me because some other homosexual men can sniff me out in public. At worst, they will try to catcall me or flirt with me. Yeah sure, I’m available but that doesn’t mean I’d love be to harassed. No one deserves to be harassed in the first place. I think I would still call it as harassment because like a straight female that would be called out by males, they are still harassed even if their tendencies would also love to screw with men. Or vice versa. I think it goes (and it should!) the same for the people in the LGBT+ Community.

There were a lot of times I was able to sense other guys even if they don’t have flamboyant movements. As for me, I’m good at hiding because my movements are very masculine. I’m sporty and I love to work out. I have a lot of rash movements and people would often overlook the few giveaways. Whenever I would open my sexuality to other people, they would always be shocked. Except for my way of walking, my butt is kinda perky because I inherited it from my mom so it kinda sways a little bit. That one really gives me away every time!!!” – Solus Magus

– “I don’t think I have gaydar…

I can sort of make an educated guess based on some factors.. interests, personality, behavior, that type of thing.

Perhaps that IS gaydar? But I wouldn’t call it that. And I only notice it when it’s fairly obvious. I’m still waiting for Nat Sweeney and Ronan Parke to come out.
We guessed right with Greyson Chance and Troye Sivan. ๐Ÿ˜€

Thing is though, there’s many, perhaps even the majority of gay guys who aren’t obvious at all. And I’d never have guessed their sexual orientation without being told.” – Mike84

– “Oh I absolutely have some form of gaydar (I think)

A couple of months ago I was at a straight club (ie one that isn’t marketed towards the LGBT community). I had been dancing for probably a good 2 hours to this point, and I had made eye contact with this guy probably 3 times that night. A few minutes later I found myself next to him at the bar and asked if he wanted to leave and probably half an hour later we were in his bed. There’s other examples, mostly in the same context of being at a mixed event and eyeing a guy, making eye contact, using some line with him before getting out of there with him.

So I lean towards it existing in some form for some people.” – Comrade Jake

– “I’ve no need for gaydar here in my country. The gay people here (not bisexual) aren’t really subtle in hiding their sexuality. They typically come out between 11 – 15 years old, and even then they’re already effeminate enough to give hints. Bi guys tho? They are the ones that re hard to find :P” – MasterM

– “I shall quote someone very wise about things like this.

His name is Brandon and he’s quite smart about things like this despite the fact he’s only 14/15 years old:

I looked it up on Google the other night: Gaydar. LOL. I love the name. it’s too funny! The ability to tell who’s Gay and who isn’t. Like Professor Xavier’s telepathy or something. Now, some guys it’s, like, ‘THUPER eathy’ to tell that they are Gay. I mean they wear it like a badge of honor. Swishing and mincing around. Wearing pink and rainbow colors obsessively. Doing their hair in that way. You know the way? I can’t describe it….it just is….Gay!

But that’s not Gaydar. That’s just observing obvious behavior. Gaydar basically ‘Outs’ someone to you. They either do something or say something Gay or they just have this vibe. it’s very subtle. I think I have a little of it but I think if Jimmy’s already figured Joe and I out he must have some serious Gaydar abilities. I’m talking Mutant Superpower here!

His long looks at me all naked brings back that full body blush again. I guess girls do this all the time to guys and I know straight guys do this shamelessly with girls, but it looks like gay guys do it too.

I looked that up on Google (of course). Cruising they call it in Gay lingo. When you are cruising you’re looking for a Gay partner or hookup. If you are being cruised then somebody is checking you out.

I get the feeling Jimmy was cruising me hard today.

A-Ha! You know what? I just remembered! it’s the same feeling I got when AJ ‘cruised’ me at the Mall last month. Totally!

Ok, there’s no question then. AJ is the most flamboyantly Gay guy I’ve ever seen. He is one of the ones I was just talking about. Wearing it like a badge.

So, ergo (heheheheh – There goes my mathematical Spock logic) if I get the same feeling from Jimmy that I got from AJ then it stands to reason that Jimmy is Gay too. Just not as Pride Parade as AJ is.

So THIS is Gaydar? A process of comparing notes with older experiences? How scientific!

It still doesn’t explain how Jimmy picked up on Joe and I so quick. Like I said, Gaydar power Class 3 Mutant.

I couldn’t have said it any better myself!” – MrM

– “I got nothing…

I have never been any good at working out other people, sure I have seen people who I thought might be gay by their mannerisms/body language but I was wrong just as often as I was right.

Years ago I worked in a bar and a girl used to come in occasionally who claimed to have perfect gaydar and would stand at the bar pointing out people to her friends who she was sure were gay/lesbian or bi….strange that her perfect gaydar always had me as straight.” – Tricky71

– “I can’t really say that I believe in the whole ‘mystical’ idea of gaydar being some sort of sixth sense, but I do believe that a certain amount of self awareness, when applied to the people around you, can give you a bit of insight that your average person might not have access to. Basically, that just means…know yourself, and it will help you to know others. I recognize little phrases, or behaviors, or certain evasion tactics in casual conversation, that often send up a signal here and there. Like, if you ask a straight person if they’re gay, they’ll usually just tell you ‘no’. Not in a disgusted way. It’s just not who they are. But if they overdo their reaction? That can be a red flag, and the behavior to follow is usually meant to ‘prove’ their point. Also, if they hit you with, “Why do you need to know?” Or “That’s none of your business.” That’s fair enough…but also sets off another red flag. I notice when somebody plays the pronoun game when talking about someone they like, or if a really cute guy walks by and he becomes slightly distracted. It’s not just about someone’s voice, or their interest in show tunes, or their fashion sense, or their mannerisms. Those can be misleading. But I know all the ways that I have used in the past to hide myself when I was younger. I remember the excuses and the deflections and the overcompensation. I know them by heart. So when I see someone else using those same tactics, it’s like having a moment of ‘ohhhh…I think I see what’s happening here.’ And to be honest, It’s rare that I’m that far off. Even when I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt. Still, the most important thing for me is to not to out anybody or make them uncomfortable with further questions. I usually just get a few ideas in my head, feel them out, and if they decide they want to talk about it? Great. If not? Great. No rush. No pressure. But I’ve spent enough tie in the closet growing up to know exactly what it takes to keep that door locked for an extended period of time. So…I know when I see something familiar in the people around me. That’s about as close to gaydar as you can get, in my opinion.” – Comicality

– “I think my Gaydar is about 85% correct.

I’ve made a few mistakes in the past but mostly it’s been ok. I’ve said before when I was single I found it easier to get a guy I like in a straight club so my Gaydar had to be pretty accurate with guys you thought would play. What throws me though is that there are so many really pretty guys about and it’s easy to assume they’re gay. It’s not always true, bad gaydar lol.

A time when my Gaydar really went haywire but it worked out fine. Back when I was 18 and had sort of started working I used to meet up with friends after work for a couple drinks in one of the gay bars. One time this really gorgeous guy was there with a couple other guys, blond hair, blue eyes which is not usually my type I’m more for dark hair etc. Whatever I walked down the stairs and you know that telepathy thing, aura, wtv. He noticed me and I noticed him and we smiled that smile. We kept glancing at each other from separate ends of the bar or where we were sitting, he was with his friends I was with mine. This went on for a couple nights and the third night I went to order some drinks noticed he was doing the same and purposely stood next to him. We said hi etc. and straight away I realized I’d been a dumb fuk. He was a she, yeps a gay girl. ๐Ÿ™‚ A quick shock hit me but I didn’t let it phase me we started small talk and stuff. She asked if I ever went there lunchtime and I told her no but said I could and we arranged to meet the next day, lunchtime. We did and it was great just she and me. We were both gay but she had a bi side and so did I so that night we got it on it was awesome it was like being with a boy with no dick lol. It happened about 5 times over the next couple weeks then she got close to another girl. We still talked and were really good friends then after about 2 months they moved to Manchester together. We’re still good friends and still in contact with each other so even though gaydar screwed up big time, but in a way maybe not like she was gay lolz, it worked out fine.” – Dot

– “Mine is definitely on the fritz! It would be so much easier if everyone had one of those Sims icons ๐Ÿ™‚

Hell, I’ve been told (rarely i might add) that this or that guy was flirting or interested in me… I never saw it. Could of hit me with a sledge hammer and I wouldnt of guessed..;p
It would be cool that everyone had a sims icon above them that glowed pink if they were gay and sort of pulsed if they were into you…

But seriously the whole gaydar is a nice idea but lets face it, most gay people act just the same as straight people for the large part.

I’ve found out (sadly) later after being around some people I’ve met that they were gay .. but you would never of guessed it.

I also am very straight acting in the real world and ive never been a gregarious or expressive person so no one ever suspects me of being gay.

So yeah.. i want people to have a Sims gaydar icon thingy :)” – Dom

– “I’ve always joked that my gaydar was either broken or, I got the economy trial gay’ish’dar which is a beta version and buggier than a piece of hard candy sitting next to an ant hill. As I’ve told many people throughout the years, I am a gay male who is attracted to straight acting males. Flamboyancy has always struck me as a little over the top and doesn’t really interest me. I’m not sure why that is but, it does mean that if I am to ever find “the one” I would need a really good gaydar. I’ve always been able to find straight guys who weren’t hung up on the whole “messing around with a friend” thing, which was awesome when I was a teen but always ended out in a heartbreak once it was no longer wanted. (Guy finds a girlfriend, moves away, gets bored with sex play with someone who is just a friend…) As an adult, feeling that out with other adult males can be responded to violently so, that would be where my gaydar should help. Right?

No, not at all. When I was a kid, I found this type of attraction in older teens. I found it in an adult only once when I was still really young (10) and he took advantage of my immature knowledge so he could hurt me. Granted, I’m an adult now but, that fear and anxiety rises to the surface with peer-aged males. Hence, how I believe my gaydar got broken in the first place. There have been times when I really thought another guy was cute but, they were “too straight” to even consider so I never even tried. Times when I would either run into that person years later and meet their boyfriend “Oh yeah, by the way. I’m gay.” or be talking to another friend and be told, “You knew so-and-so was gay, right?” When that started happening too often, I just gave up on my gaydar and any hope of finding someone who wanted to share my life with me. Sad thing is, there is no warranty against breakage with a gaydar. If it becomes gay’ish it generally causes more heartache than if it was simply nonexistent.

Yes, I’ve called gaydar tech support already. They asked for my member ID. Apparently, the economy trial beta version isn’t supported anymore.” – JeffsFort

– “I do poorly when it comes to gaydar, and worse, being able to tell if someone finds me attractive (short of something pretty overt). Grabbing my butt works, but that I prefer something more subtle until I get to know someone.

I think I might give mixed signals to others when it comes to my sexuality. I am open about being gay, but usually don’t bring up the subject. As a first appearance, I might look athletic (albeit short – guys say I have a “boy’s body”) and masculine. Beyond first appearances I am shy, thoughtful, and who knows what others see. Beyond that is a different matter, but that’s outside the need for gaydar.

I haven’t seen clothing mentioned on this thread. I have an unusual mixture. Plenty of “normal” men’s cloths. But I have a 27″ inseam, and a bit of a big butt and legs from my bicycle racing. I found women’s jeans and shorts fit pretty good, though I go for ones less feminine looking. Plus, I like shorts that are actually short. With my inseam, most men’s shorts come below my knees.” – Jon

 

Published August 15, 2018