You can easily see them from a distance. You know…the ‘beautiful people’. Or…at least what is recognized as being aesthetically beautiful. Everybody is somebody else’s dream boy or dream girl, no matter what. But despite the varying tastes that exist within the eye of the beholder…there seems to be a certain status of beauty that seems to be agreed upon with the social majority. And our question is…how does this affect how you treat these people, or how they treat you?
Think about it…are you nicer to someone who you find extremely cute? Do you make their needs a priority in your life? Do you rush in to make sure that they’re happy? If you looked the way they do…do you think that your life would be any different than it is right now?
Or maybe you’re on the other side of the fence. Maybe you’re the beautiful one. Do you feel eyes on you when you go outside? Do you feel privileged or admired in any way?
Is beauty a blessing, or a curse?
Feel free to be honest about this, because I’d really love to hear your thoughts on this. Are the beautiful strangers of the world put on a pedestal and worshiped by the majority of normal society? Even when that beauty is only skin deep? (I know some real HOTTIES that are complete assholes! Hehehe, so…no thank you!)
Share your thoughts with us! Either put them in the reply section below, or you can email them to me at Comicality@webtv.net if you want to put your two cents in or respond anonymously! Thanks in advance! And I’ll seezya soon!
– “Funnily enough, I was thinking about this recently, well kinda…
Wouldn’t it be a better, more fairer world if your personal level of physical beauty actually represented how ‘beautiful’ a person you were on the inside too?
And the level of beauty can increase and decrease over time, so you can get better, or worse looking, depending on your personality.
It would incentivize people to be nice to each other. To be good people. It would also work as a clear signal for who to avoid. Like, a really physically ugly person was that way because they are not very nice people. And beautiful people had actually ‘earned’ their beauty, rather than winning the genetic jackpot.
I can’t think of a downside to this.
It might sound shallow but that’s the world we live in. Looks matter to many, if not most people. And it’s an easy way to recognize information. Information like “I am a nice person, I’m likely to help you if you need it.”
Or, “I’m a twat. Stay away. I’m likely to use you for my own means.”
Although, I have noticed that people I come to know, if they’re nice people, they tend to “appear” more attractive, over time. And the ones who I first thought were good looking, if they’re not nice people, tend to have their looks tainted by their rotten personalities.
As to the question, how do I treat good looking people? I’d like to think that I treat them the same way I treat everyone else, and on a conscious level, that’s probably true. But I think on a subconscious level, it might not be.
But only to a point because I have known ‘attractive’ jerks before, and I didn’t treat them any differently than I would have, had they been ugly jerks, and tried to avoid them when I could.
That said, my tastes are peculiar, I tend to have a specific facial type that I am attracted to, and what I find beautiful isn’t necessarily considered conventionally beautiful by most people.
So those I am ‘dazzled’ by probably aren’t aware of the reason for my sweetness towards them, because they probably don’t think they’re especially attractive people.” – Mike
– “My thoughts about beauty…
I think everyone has their own idea of what is beautiful. Some appear obviously beautiful that all can see they look nice, even if they are not your type of beauty. Most of the time you will not approach them because you know or at least think you are not in their class and don’t want to be rejected.
Unfortunately that attitude makes you feel inferior and you don’t take a chance when there is really nothing to lose by giving that “beautiful” person a chance. Unless they are stuck up or pure assholes, they will talk to you. If they don’t want to talk, don’t be discouraged to try again It is their lose. It may lead to nothing except a short talk, or it might lead to a good friendship at the least and maybe more. We may also not approach someone because they don’t meet our standards of beauty or we are just not in the mood to give someone a chance. This is unfortunate because it might again lead to a good friendship and possibly more, such as a loving relationship. Looks give no insight into whether a person is nice and worthy of our friendship or not.
One of my favorite stories is “Beauty and the Beast” which I think most of us understand the moral of that story. That story shows both sides of judging someone by their looks. It takes time to get to know someone well enough to see if they have values that you find beautiful or ugly. And the most beautiful person outside can be ugly inside and vice versa. I thought a long time about characteristics that make me love someone. Some of these are caring, kindness, considerate, understanding, intellect, loyal, humorous, empathy, confident, stable, honest, and have some similar interests.
Everyone has their own ideas of what they look for. Someone doesn’t have to have all the qualities to be someone you like. Of course physical attraction is usually what we see first and it will have an influence on our decisions. Beauty is what we think it is, just give the person a chance.”
– “To be honest…I’m pretty sure that I do.
I don’t exactly know how to feel about that. Because I don’t really think of myself as a shallow person. And the haze of beauty doesn’t distract me for long. I mean, if you’re drop dead gorgeous…but your personality doesn’t match the pretty gift box that it came in, my infatuation fades pretty quickly. There have been some celebrities that I was like, WOW!!! And I can’t wait to see them in an interview to hear them speak and get a feel for who they are. And I’ve been disappointed. Hehehe, like…well…he’s still hot. Just…not much else.
But, before knowing anything about them, when it comes to that first initial smack in the face with someone who is absolutely stunning? I feel like I DO give them more attention. I smile, and I flirt, and I cater to them sometimes. I don’t know why, I just do.
I’ve never had any serious hang ups about my own looks. I’ve never walked a modeling catwalk or anything, but I’ve received enough compliments to know that I’m nowhere near as ugly as I feel sometimes. In fact, a lot of those compliments are a little embarrassing for me, and I avoid them like the plague if I can. But…I feel like if I looked like some of the boys I’ve had major crushes on over the years, hehehe…I would have taken over the whole PLANET by now! LOL! Seriously!
But I think a big party of beauty is confidence. And sometimes, it’s just the ability to be comfortable in your own skin that allows you to come off as appealing and alluring to other people. Sure, there’s something to be said about having all of your genetic molecules come together in an amazing way to make you a physical sduction from a distance…but you can’t really know somebody from a distance. You certainly can’t LOVE them from back there.
So, while I have to admit to rewarding the pretty people with a bit of an advantage every now and then when it comes to my attention…it’s all on the surface. After that, I’m looking more for the beauty on the inside, rather than on the outside.
You can’t just sprinkle sugar on shit and call it ice cream…you know? :)” – Comicality
“I like to think I treat everyone the same way.
However obviously due to preconceptions and social pressures growing up one gravitates to certain types of people. I was privileged as a person by having a stable home life. I was lucky enough to never be aware of any problems and always seemed there was ample of everything. ( I know now that there were times that was not the case and my folks shielded me from it)
As for looks? I would of in the past said looks mattered allot but now as long as they seem a decent person and not bats shit insane (like my neighbour!) then all is good.” – Dom
“When I was a teenager I was ‘The Prettiest Boy In School.’ Not the big strong jock with the muscles. Not the ‘Bad boy’ with the attitude and the leather.
I was ‘Pretty.’
Being pretty and being a boy was not a good combo, especially in the time when I grew up which was the Stranger Things era EXACTLY. That show casts fairly perfectly what life was like as a teen in the 80s. The Pretty Boys were not nerds, but they were usually something else bad if not worse. Usually a ‘Fag.’ It was ok, if you were a Fag, to mess with you in the boys locker room according to some of the assholes in there. The fact that I was Gay only made this situation worse because I had to convince people I wasn’t Gay when I was being called Gay all the time and was the object of possible sexual harassment by the other boys in the school that thought that was a ‘joke’ to do things like that.
The girls would pay attention, but then look away and think you were ‘stuck-up’ because they didn’t want to risk being rejected (which, then, I probably would not have done, but later would have).
I was avoided and derided a lot to the point where I thought I was unattractive and it made my personality sour which then made me completely unapproachable. If a boy had been seriously interested in me and had a mind to seduce me away from the strictures of my family and religious beliefs of the time then my sullen attitude probably would have killed their courage before they even attempted to get close.
When I went out to places alone I’d get ‘kissed’ at by guys and solicited for sex which they thought was funny, basically emasculating me in public. In the Gay parts of town, if I’d made the mistake of ending up there, I’d have men pull up and make offers which made me, at the time, feel very weird and afraid. I was 15-16 at the time, mind you. Once, I had a full on Goth guy in makeup basically looking like Lestat follow me around a Nordstrom . I was sure he’d corner me and ‘do’ me if I didn’t lose him. That was scary and yet, at the same time, I . . . Wanted it too! He was truly beautiful!
As I grew older I put on some weight and my features ‘roughened up’ a bit which got me out of being Pretty, but I had lost all my confidence so I didn’t stand out at all anymore. I became invisible, which was weird, because, as bad as the attention was when I was a teen, it was at least some attention.
I’m middle-aged now and when I look back at old pictures of myself I can ‘see’ it, now. But when I was younger, I was very confused by the mixed signals and attention and totally misinterpreted a lot of it. I didn’t feel attractive at all. I felt like an alien. Maybe some would think this is ‘First World Problems’ territory, but for the Prettiest Boy In School that didn’t mean you were Big Man On Campus with all the girls falling at your feet. You were just weird!
If only I had found my ‘Billy’ in those days maybe my ‘Brandon’ years would have been more beautiful.
So my experience of being Pretty didn’t award me special treatment at unless you call catcalls and near molestation ‘special treatment.’
Today, I tend to treat the ‘Pretty’ ones with a bit of wisdom. Never let it go to your head if you do believe in your own gorgeousness and if you don’t believe in it, let ME believe in it for you, because God knows that you are a world of beauty if you only let it shine!” – MrM
If you guys want to add your two cents to any one of the ‘Q & A’ sessions for future issues of Imagine Magazine, we’d LOVE to hear your input and your personal stories on the forum! Feel free to attach your screen name, or do so anonymously! Drop by this forum OR Imagine’s NEW “Inner Visions” forum on the 1st and 15th of every month for a brand new topic of conversation! We look forward to hearing more from you! 🙂