The touch of Alex’s hand against mine was enough to leave me breathless beyond belief. I, honestly, found myself quivering with anticipation at the idea of being somewhere truly alone with him again. I’ve always been nervous around him. I’ve always had a fearful flutter of unstable emotions bouncing around in the pit of my stomach like some kind of hellish pinball game. But…that was mostly based on MY thoughts, and MY expectations of what might be possible if I just closed my eyes and took my delightful fantasies at face value. You know? But this? This was different. This was Alex actually telling me that he’d be more than willing to make good on that erotic promise, if only we could find the right place at the right time.
I’m thinking that this is the right place, and the right time! What are the odds?
As we were getting ready to leave the cafeteria and find our special hiding place away from this madness, I happened to see Preston’s eyes flutter open slowly, watching us. “Hey…where are you guys going?” He whispered, still cuddled up closely under Donovan’s right arm.
Alex and I both pressed our fingers to our lips to keep him quiet. Even though he was whispering now, his playfully ‘pipsqueak’ laden voice would wake up all of the other boys around him if he uttered just a few words in his regular tone.
“We’ll be back in a minute.” I whispered back to him.
“Are you guys gonna go exploring? I wanna come.” He said. Hehehe, ‘exploring’? What the heck was he talking about?
We both shook our heads, hoping to get Preston to believe that we weren’t running out to do anything ‘fun’. Well, nothing that he could participate in, anyway. Hehehe! Although…now that I think about it…
Nah…it’s best that I don’t think about it.
Alex and I moved out into the hallway, attempting to look casual and not draw much attention to ourselves if we could help. Which is becoming increasingly difficult, considering that every soldier that walked past us seemed to be examining us from head to toe. Looking for signs. Scars. A bruise or blemish. An unwarranted cough. It’s amazing how quickly they can turn on us with just a few whispers and a conspiracy theory or two. Who even knows if the whole ‘teenager hormone’ thing is real or not? That could have been some crazy lunatic screaming that shit while lost in a wild panic or something. Right? We haven’t had any problems like that since we’ve been in this shelter, and we seem to be doing just fine.
I don’t know. It’s hard to figure out how mass hysteria works sometimes.
“Ok…so where do we go?” Alex whispered into my ear. Just feeling his warm breath on my cheek is making me hard again. I can’t believe we’re going somewhere to tongue kiss and touch each other and maybe even MORE! I’ve never been more excited!
“We have to go to the Froshman wing of the school.” I whispered back. “They used to let all of the students have their own staircase up to the mini theater on the third floor where they held rehearsals for school plays and assemblies, but after they caught Froshman sneaking upstairs to ditch class and stuff, they shut it off and took their privileges away. Upperclassmen only.”
“So, wait…will we be able to get through?”
“Definitely. The lock they put on the door was basically for show. I guess the faculty didn’t want to spend any real money on it.” I told him. “I’ve opened it up before. You can use any key to twist the lock and open it up. Hell, I could probably use my fingernail if I wasn’t worried about it breaking off in the process.” Alex and I smiled at one another, but straightened up as we saw a small platoon of six soldiers turn the corner and come walking towards us. We didn’t dare look them in the eye. They were all armed, and super serious. We just tried to stay out of their way, but I could feel their eyes on us regardless. The comfort factor in this place is dwindling fast. God, I hope my parents and Alex’s parents are on this next caravan so we can get the fuck out of here and stop being treated like some kind of faulty hand grenade that could go off at any second.
Not that I’ve made up my mind yet about taking the rest of my friends with me just yet. I’m starting to think that Cain may just have to deal with it.
Alex and I waited until the coast was clear, and then we started making our way further down the hall to the Froshman wing. My high school was a big place, but it wasn’t so massive that you couldn’t get from one point to another during a regular seven minute passing period between classes. So we kept our path close to the lockers on the right side of the hall, and double checked around every corner for any military personnel or shelter refugees that might be watching.
I think Cooper was right, though. Everybody seemed to be too preoccupied with readying the facility for the incoming caravans to really pay much attention to anything else. Much to our benefit. Still…the whole vibe of this place was changing more and more with each passing hour. I could feel it. It was like having the water go ice cold on you in the middle of a hot shower. But I didn’t want to concentrate on that right now. I wanted to be with my new boyfriend. I wanted to keep some small spark of hope in my heart, and continue dreaming that there would somehow be a way to fix all of this madness and have the world go back to normal. A world where Alex and I could be together…forever. And indulge in the kind of love and affection that many other people will never ever know.
I just wanted to hold on to the fantasy that the world would give us another chance to do things right, you know? I mean…it can’t just come to an end, right? Not now. Not like this.
Please, God…not like this.
“This way?” Alex asked.
“Shh shh…hold on a sec…” I made sure that we waited until the hallway was clear before anybody saw us fooling around with the staircase lock. There were a few civilians milling around, including the lady with the red blanket. I don’t know what it is, but something about her just makes me severely uncomfortable. And that’s weird, because she doesn’t really do much. Doesn’t really say much. In fact, I don’t think I can remember her ever speaking a single word the whole time that she’s been here. But…her eyes. Her expression. Her entire aura seems to be heavily tainted by the horror that exists just on the other side of those high school gates. The blood and carnage in the streets…? It’s like she personifies it. Her very presence is a reminder to us all that we’re not really safe. And that it’s only a matter of time before we’re all forced to deal with the fact that civilization as we once knew it…is done. Gone. Erased.
And things will never be the same ever again.
I hate to say it, but her visual trauma keeps piercing through the overly optimistic illusion that this will all be ok again someday. And…a part of me truly resents her for it.
“I think she’s leaving…” Alex whispered. And I peeked around the lockers to make sure we were safe to move forward.
“M’kay. Let’s go!” I rushed forward, taking my old house key out of my pocket, and searching left and right for any soldiers that might walk through and catch us by surprise. My key was skinny enough to fit into the lock, even though it wasn’t the right key. But, like I said, they did a terrible job at finding something suitable to keep any kid with an ounce of ingenuity out of there.
A few twists to the right. A few to the left. A jiggle here, a wiggle there…and…’click’! Got it!
I opened the door and Alex and I dashed inside before anybody else could see us. The whole high school was getting overcrowded, but you could still find minor pockets of isolation whenever people had something else going on. Moths to a flame…while we sneak around in the dark.
Both of us were already giggling. Giddy with anticipation. My stiff inches were sticking out at an obscene angle in my pants, but I didn’t really care. We were both fully aware of the passion in our hearts, and our secret plan to share that passion the moment we found a place to do it. Honestly, seeing Alex naked for the first time was enough to drive me batshit crazy! I’ve never even HAD sex before…but I knew that I wanted to touch him, to rub him, to taste him all over. I can’t even imagine what it’s going to be like to do that with another boy, but I knew that I wanted it more than anything in this world. And I was just a few flights of steps away from making that happen.
Then…just as we passed the second floor, we heard voices outside of the staircase! SHIT!!!
I didn’t know if we should RUN or stay still! But as a couple of soldiers got closer to the second floor door…a door that they weren’t even supposed to KNOW about…Alex and I panicked and ran up the next flight, halfway to the next level. Then we stopped. We heard the door open, and we knew that they would be able to hear our footsteps if we kept going, so we had no choice but to freeze and pray to God that they wouldn’t decided to come upstairs.
“Look, orders or no orders…I’m not going to be involved in some kind of bloodbath. Point blank period.” One of the soldiers said as they stepped into the stairwell. “You heard what the Sarge said. We’re all on high alert as of right now. NOBODY gets a free pass in this place! NOBODY!”
“They’re just kids, Flint. What are we gonna do? Lock them in a boiler room and see if they devour each other alive?” Another soldier replied.
The third soldier said, “If that’s what it takes, yes!” needless to say, Alex and I were listening closely at this point, while still hiding half a floor above them. “This isn’t just a civilian Peace Corps mission, you guys. This is pure survival. A vast majority of the population in this shelter could turn into one of those things at any moment. And we wouldn’t even know that we were totally fucked until it was too late to do anything about it.” Soon adding, “And now? They’re adding two MORE caravans to this place! How are we supposed to keep this facility safe and secure when they keep bringing in potential hostiles from the outside?”
“They’re not hostiles. They’re people fleeing from a bad situation that they have no control over. They’re looking for help.”
“And, at the same time, they’re bringing the same filth and danger with them that they’re supposed to be running from. You don’t think that’s hostile? It’s a threat to everybody here. ALL of us.”
We listened to them bicker back and forth for a few minutes, with neither side willing to budge on their outlook, or even listen for an opportunity to compromise. All while keeping a loaded assault rifle on their hip, with extra clips in case they run out of ammunition. And these are our protectors? The ones who think the youth are so dangerous? A plague waiting to happen? What did we do that was so wrong?
One of the soldiers said, “Did you hear that the second convoy actually picked up some survivors from Hillside? They’re bringing them here…with the rest of us.”
“Hillside? I thought that whole shit show killed everybody involved. How were there any survivors to be rescued?”
“I don’t know. But somehow, they found a few stragglers, and word is that they’re bringing them in. So now we’ve got even more of a threat on our hands.” He said. “I don’t know about you two, but I’m starting to think that we might have to bail on this place eventually.”
“Hey! Don’t even joke around about that!” The other soldier said. “We’ve got a duty to the people in this place. Abandoning our posts is not an option. Do you hear me?”
“Do you really think that our ‘duty’ is going to matter much once this shelter gets overrun by those fucking things out there? Which one of you is willing to get cannibalized down to the bone for the US military if this shit pops off tomorrow? Huh?” He replied. “What are we fighting for? There’s no winning this? No government. No medals of honor. No pension or college tuition waiting for us at the end of this black rainbow, fellas. This is kill or be killed. And the enemy has us surrounded on all sides, at all times. If we miss just ONE step…it’s a total checkmate. As honor bound as I am to serve and protect…I’m not going to even pretend that I signed up for this. We’re fighting a losing battle here. And once people fully realize that it’s happening…I’m not going to be the only one looking to save his own ass out there. This is just a ‘taste’ of what’s to come. And I almost want the breakdown to happen already so I can stop worrying about it all the time.”
I have to admit to feeling a cold shiver run down my spine when I heard him say that. Because we’re not far from having to fend for ourselves in this new apocalyptic world. It’s disturbing to think that the people we’re depending on most may feel the same way.
Suddenly, over the radio, we heard orders being given to hurry back out to the second floor and secure the perimeter. It was spoken in codes that neither Alex nor I could understand, but it sounded urgent. All three soldiers hurried out of the stairwell to see what was going on, and we could only pray that it wasn’t something too serious.
The mask of normality was cracking at the seams. We wouldn’t be able to deny it for too much longer. And still…we just wanted to enjoy what was left of our romantic fantasy. Just for a little bit longer.
“I think they’re gone.” I said, looking back at Alex over my shoulder. But he seemed to have this really frightened look o his face. “Are you ok?”
“I was hoping that my mom and dad would be on one of the next caravans to show up, but…it doesn’t sound like they’ll be too welcome here if they are.” He said.
I gave Alex a kiss on the cheek, and I said, “They’re just scared. That’s all.”
“We’re all scared.” He told me. “But we’re not all carrying guns and barking orders at one another. When the people in charge are the ones who are the most paranoid…everybody suffers for it. All of us.”
There was a part of me that wanted to comfort him and tell him that I was sure that everything would be fine…but that wouldn’t be honest. I don’t even know if my own parents are safe in all of this mess, how could I possibly hope to console the fears and concerns of somebody else.
Denial was our closest friend right now. It’s the only thing to keep our brains from cracking wide open with a quake of insanity that none of us were ready to handle just yet.
“Do you…want to go back?” I asked, really really hoping that he’d say no.
“Go back?” He asked. “Oh…no. I’m ok.” Then he peeked into my eyes. “Do you want to go back?”
I let a little smile spread across my lips, and slowly shook my head. “Nope.” Maybe we didn’t say it out loud, but it was clearly understood that a little bit of love is what we needed right now. Not just as a distraction from the truths we may have to face if things get any worse out there…but as a reminder of what we’re fighting to hold on to. What brought us together, and what keeps us strong.
The last thing that I’d ever want is to end up walking around the shelter like that woman with the red blanket. I want to keep living. I want to keep loving. I want to keep laughing. Otherwise…
I’d be no different than the mindless hordes on the other side of that gate…
We measured our steps so as not to make too much noise…made our way to the third floor…and peeked outside to see if the hall was completely empty. We had to be standing pretty close together to peer through the darkness, and feeling my hand on the back of is shoulder gave me such a rush, and yet a feeling of total comfort at the same time. He looked back at me with those bright green eyes of his, and smiled. “Which way?”
“The little theater is to your right. Just around the corner.” I whispered.
“M’kay. Three…two…one…go!” He said, and we hurried out of the staircase to the assembly doors of the theater. They weren’t locked or anything. They never were. Slipping inside the dark theater and stage area was easy, and I took a hold of Alex’s hand to guide him behind the curtain and off to the side where there was a small dressing room of sorts. It was only about the size of two walk-in closets combined, and we had to push a few costumes back against the walls to fit in there…but for now…it was our oasis. Our paradise away from the madness. A place just for us.
We closed the door as I turned on the light above. Dim. Flickering a bit every few seconds. But it was enough light for me to see his beauty up close like I wanted to. I saw him looking around our small space, and there was just something cute to me about his curiosity. All I could do was stare at him, feeling my heart pound and spasm with the promise of his next kiss. And once his eyes stopped darting around and looked back at me, we shared a grin…and we stepped closer.
There was always this awkward moment of love stricken hesitation whenever I got this close to him. A mandatory pause where I was expecting to wake up from this surreal dream and be tossed back into a cold world where love’s perfection and perpetual bliss no longer exists for me. It takes a moment to shake off the feeling of utter disbelief, but it’s only a few seconds later that the pull on my emotions becomes greater than the fear of being lost in some sort of intense deception. And as his hands reached for mine, our fingers threading their way between each other…I knew the kiss was inevitable. And it left me absolutely breathless.
Minutes fly by like the shimmering light of falling stars. Bright and exciting enough for you to notice, but fleeting in their brilliance. I think I could stand here and make out with my boyfriend through the changing seasons and never tire of it, my arms now moving to snake their way around his slim hips and pull him closer. The gentle sound of smacking lips could be heard in the silence, our eyes closed, with only the sensation of our mutual craving to guide us. But things were now moving into unfamiliar territory. Hands began to roam more freely. Moans were being expressed with more passion. And we were pushing against one another so closely that it was difficult to tell where one body ended and the other began. But the intensity of our kissing continued to escalate, nonetheless. Building, building, building…
But to what, exactly?
I didn’t know, for sure…but I was soooo anxious to find out.
My breathing got even heavier as my hands were no longer content to just ‘pass over’ the arts of Alex’s body that intrigued me most. Now they began to squeeze…and clutch…and grope. In the most brazenly intimate way. My hands ran up under his shirt to feel the smoothness of his soft skin, then back around to grip the ripened melons of the beautiful ass I had just seen in the shower. They moved up to his head to hold him tightly against my lips, the damp ‘feelers’ of his buzz cut fuzziness tickling my palm as we both began to whimper with desperation. My hardness sliding up and down against his, my skin shivering with electrified goosebumps, my head…dizzy with a fondness for Alex that I had never experienced before. Not even after all we had done with each other so far. I still wanted more. I NEEDED more!
I don’t know what had come over me, but I stepped forward slightly, and with our lips still tightly connected in an erotic embrace, I lightly pushed Alex’s shoulders back against the wall and tilted my head to suck, tenderly, at the side of his neck.
“Omigod…” He sighed, his knees dipping a bit from the shock of the sensation. I let my hands feel him all over as I chewed at the soft skin that I found there. Inhaling the collection of teenage pheromones that I found there, licking the surface of his flesh, rubbing my nose back and forth just beneath the line of his jaw…bringing back memories of a special blanket I had as a child when I used to suck my thumb to go to sleep. Oh the comfort it brought me.
And yet, it was a ‘higher than usual’ pitch in his pleasurable whimpers that caused me to go further. I let my hand move forward, and I rubbed the front of his pants. He was soooo hard. I closed my fingers around as much of his shaft as I could through his pants, and I felt the excited organ jump and throb beneath my fingers. I moved back up to tongue kiss him some more, and I felt his erection swelling and tightening, again and again…trying to break free from its confines and find its sweet release.
I didn’t want to deny its freedom.
I have no previous experience with this sort of thing at all…but I was hoping that some sort of ancient genetic instinct for making love would take over and instruct me on doing it right. So…I broke our lustful kiss, and looked into Alex’s emerald orbs as I used both hands to unbutton the front of his pants and carefully lower the zipper. He didn’t protest. In fact, he leaned forward to kiss me even harder than he did before, causing me to yelp softly with an overwhelming burst of desire.
To reach in and pull his hardness out with my bare hand…wow.
How could it be so hard and so soft at the same time? The skin was like silk, with a sparse decoration of freshly grown hair that was just in the beginning stages of presenting itself. Growing shyly from a body in transition. The sensual heat of it seemed like it should have scalded my palm and fingers, but there was a coolness coming from leaking seed that puddled at the head of its circumcised tip. I took a moment to feel it all over. The shaft, the ridge, the spongy tip, the sticky liquid, and the exquisite design of wrinkles in the tender nuggets underneath. He was beautiful. My boyfriend is SO beautiful!
Again…minutes passed us by as though it was racing towards some sort of finish line, and I found myself reaching a level of obsession with touching him down there that made me want to go even further. Holding back was no longer an option. I had already given myself over to the idea of this being a reality now. Of us being alone. Of us being joined as one. And I don’t think I could have stopped myself, even if I wanted to.
So after a few more slow strokes of his hard inches, feeling it throb as Alex shuddered with pre-orgasmic bliss…I took a half step backwards, and I lowered myself down to my knees before him. I think Alex was a bit surprised at first, but then just ran his fingers through my hair, leaned his head back…and closed his eyes. Waiting for his first dive into raw sexuality with another boy. Waiting to finally realize the delight in his boyish fixation the way that I was waiting for my own.
I was staring right at it now. Feeling it bounce slightly with every beat of his eager heart. I was able to inhale its naughty fragrance, sensual and inviting….intoxicating, really. A clear liquid was growing out of the tiny slit at the tip, and I stuck my tongue out to take an experimental lick of the substance. “Jesus!” Alex gasped, trembling from the sensation. I LOVE being able to make Alex wiggle like that. It was such a turn on for me. So I did it again. I licked the salted butter flavored dribblings from the blushed helmet of his manhood, and then sucked the rest of it off of the top, my fingers squeezing a bit more of his tasty offering with a single stroke. Then, without further hesitation, I opened my mouth, and I moved forward to take him between my sucking lips and fully taste the love that I had been dreaming about for as long as I can remember.
My tongue went wild with the flavor that assaulted my tastebuds. The scent of his shower still lingering on his skin, the feel of his quivering inches as they discovered a sexual pleasure that they had never known. I sucked him with my eyes closed, enjoying every delicious moment of it. I wanted to remember this magical moment for the rest of my life. I was so erect that I thought I might have to stop and undress as well to keep from making a mess in my own pants without even touching myself.
Alex’s pants began to slide down a little bit, and I just used my hands to pull them down to his ankles. This time, coming back up to lick and suck at his balls for a few minutes as he twitched above me. A little giggle escaped his lips. “Hehehe…that tickles a little bit.”
“Oh yeah?” I whispered, and I buried my nose and lips right under his balls to attack them with even more passion than before, making him giggle a bit louder, his hands on my head to hold me back a little bit. Not asking me to stop, mind you. Just trying to find some time to get used to the sensation.
I slid my hands up and down his thighs, and then reached around to grab a hold of his ample cheeks, and knead them, lovingly, as I licked my way back to his blushed tip and began to suck him again. Vigorously. Trying my best to keep my teeth away from his most sensitive centerpiece. God, I hope I’m doing this right!
Then…all of a sudden he quickly pushed my head away.
“What? What is it? Too much?” I asked, breathlessly. “Did my teeth scrape you by accident? I’m sorry. I’ve never really…”
He quickly reached down to yank his underwear up. “Did you hear something???” He whispered, eyes wide with fear.
“Hear something? No.” I said. “Did you?”
“It sounded like somebody came in here. To the theater, I mean.”
Ok, so now my heart was pounding in my chest for an entirely different reason. We froze. There wasn’t much else that we could do. The whole closet space fell silent as we broke out of our intimate moment and held our breaths…listening for a possible intruder. A serpent in our newly found garden of Eden.
But…nothing. I didn’t hear anything at all. And frankly, I was already missing the taste of Alex in my mouth, so I reached for the elastic band of his underwear and began to lower them again. “I don’t hear anything. Nobody’s up here. We’ve got the place all to ourselves.”
“Are you sure? Dude, I swear I heard something.” He said.
“Hehehe, did it sound like this?” I said, sucking his hardness back into my mouth with a particularly loud slurp.
Alex giggled, “Yeah. It sounded a lot like that, actually. Let me hear it again?” And he smiled down at me as he brushed the hair out of my eyes, watching me using my moist lips to consume as much of him as I possibly could. “Mmmm…yeah. That’s probably what it was.” He sighed.
And I began to cup his balls with my hand as I continued to please him to the best of my ability.
The door of the closet was suddenly YANKED open!!! “A-HA!!! Gotchya!!!”
There I was, on my knees, with Alex’s hard erection in my mouth and his pants around his ankles…and we both jumped to see fucking PRESTON standing there in front of the open door to our closet!
“AHHHHHH!!!” Alex and I shouted!
“GAHHHH!!!!” Preston squealed!
“AHHHHHH!!!” We screamed again, with me wiping my lips and Alex scrambling to pull his pants back up.
“PRESTON???” I gasped.
“HOLY SMOKES!!!” He said, his immature voice cracking as his brain tried to process what he had just seen.
His eyes were so wide that I thought they were going to, literally, explode right out of his head.
Shit…ummm…I don’t think there’s a decent method of explaining this away! So…what now?