Sometimes…the heart just wants what it wants. Right? And the heart can be a bit of a BRAT when it doesn’t get it! Hehehe, sad, but true.
For this issue, I would like to ask you guys a question that seems very simple, but may end up being a bit more complicated when you think about it. That question is…
Can you truly be really close friends with someone that you’re highly attracted to?
No matter what it is that you’re attracted to…their looks, their sense of humor, their personality as a whole…what do you do if you’re constantly swooning over someone who doesn’t feel the same way about you? They may be a really true and caring friend to you, and it may be a relationship that you cherish, through and through…but is being around them more of a torture than a blessing? Does the infatuation get in the way of you two being close? Where do you draw the line between friendship and romantic intimacy?
As someone who has been through this a few times myself, I can tell you that it can be a maddening and heartbreaking experience at times. But I truly love and appreciate the good friends that I’ve made in my life, even if it can’t ever be anything more than that. But there were times…hehehe, where I had to ask what I was doing to myself and why.
So what are your thoughts on this? Let us know!
“I did once, and it wasn’t easy. My heart ached for them, and I had more than one or two sex dreams about them too. But it was all one way, and we still managed to be friends. Yes, it can be done, if you’re strong enough to control your emotions and face reality. If you delude yourself into thinking anything else can come of it, then you’re going to get hurt. I’d say “get out of that situation,” but by that point that person’s probably too caught up in their own fantasy to see sense, and reality will at some point, shake them out of it, not too gently.” – Mike
“It’s never an easy thing to deal with…
I’ve probably made some really bad decisions in my past over situations like this. But when I think back on it, I don’t know if I could have done things any differently. But I don’t want to go down that rabbit hole again. Hehehe!
The thing is, I definitely have a sense of restraint and understanding when it comes to the people that I really have strong feelings for. But it only came with trial and error and LOTS of practice. Sometimes I would get upset over the fact that they couldn’t love me back. Other times, they might have said or done something that wasn’t that bad at all…but I was so emotionally invested in them that I took it to heart a LOT harder than I would have with anybody else. And now I realize that I wasn’t being fair to them…but at the time…what else could I do? You know?
I think it’s a difficult situation to navigate through, especially when you’re younger…but you grow, you learn, you evolve. And, in time, some level of understanding is reached. Yeah, it hurts. And it sucks. But I’d never give up a cherished friendship over something as trivial as attraction and wishful thinking. True friends are harder to come by than you may think. So keep them close to your heart…even when it hurts. K?
My very best friend in the world was one of those people in my life. We’ve been best friends since we were fourteen years old, and still are to this day. I’ve seen him fall for girls, seen him date, stood at his wedding, and was there for the birth of his first child. His wife is amazing, by the way. Best choice he ever made! She’s my favorite. But I’d be lying if I said that I wouldn’t JUMP at the chance of him switching teams for a weekend! Hehehe!
What can I say? Old feelings die hard! REALLY hard! :P” – Comicality
If you guys want to add your two cents to any one of the ‘Q & A’ sessions for future issues of Imagine Magazine, we’d LOVE to hear your input and your personal stories on the forum! Feel free to attach your screen name, or do so anonymously! Drop by “The Shack Out Back” forum on the 1st and 15th of every month for a brand new topic of conversation! We look forward to hearing more from you! 🙂